Megalomania

The son-of-a-fucking-bitch has such delusions of grandeur that I am just amazed. The asshole is not even in our fucking org chart and he has the nerve to announce to people that I work for him?? Wow. Galing ha. Hanep! Sobrang bilib sa sarili, bow ako! I am not worthy! Leche! Wala, wala na ako masabi. Makarma ka nalang sana! Kung hindi pakukulam nalang talaga kita! You give gay men a bad name. And that's saying a lot!!

Moron!

Turns out that the day after friday the 13th is not my day. Yes, it's definitely not my day today. I don't understand why some people are just plain morons. Were they born that way? Is it a gift? Or is it something they learn from their mothers??

Tandang Sora

We had another serious talk with my boss today... Again he talked about wanting us to work together for the next 15 to 20 years if all works out.

I guess Spiderman's dad was right, with great power comes great responsibility...pero pucha, pano nalang ako mag aasawa niyan??! Nyemas!

m.o.m.o.l.

I learned a new term today...

MOMOL, as in "make out, make out lang."

Hahaha! I wish I could listen to magic 899 from here..sigh

This place is just so technologically retarded.

de-Tagged

Ok so I've been tagged by Hitori a long time ago and as much as I've been wanting to do it, it actually took me a 48 years to get it done. I'm telling you, procrastination will be my downfall. To be fair though, I'm in the middle of a two-week workshop so I'm extremely busy. But between preparing for my presentations and having tons of side-meetings, thinking of random things about myself has been at the back of mind. Although laos na tong tag na to, I actually found it quite intriguing since I've never really took the time to take note of my quirks.

So here goes.

1. Post these rules. 2. Post ten random facts/habits about yourself. 3. Choose ten people to tag and list their names.

10 Random Things About Me:

1. I don't like earphones. I don't like the feeling that I can't hear what's going on. It got worse after that incident at MIT, there was a shootout and some students didn't even know that people were dying. So needless to say, I've got an ipod with over 3,000 songs and I hardly ever get to use it unless it's on speakers.

2. I get turned off by inanities such as "poh," "eow," and "aq." I'm a firm believer that texting ruins your spelling and vocabulary which is why I take the time to spell the whole word. Even if it means I have to spend more time and money.

3. Chewing with matching slurps and sounds absolutely drives me up the wall. I just hate it. If you chew that way in front of me, it would take all my powers not to say something rude. Whenever it happens I try to tune the other person out but I still hate it. All my friends chew properly.

4. I have mood swings which are like fungal infection, the best way to aggravate it is by scratching it. It's better left ignored. It's not about you. If it is, the more you can't do anything about it.

5. I can't stand hypocrisy. I don't care about your genealogy, ethnicity, or your curriculum vitae. Intelligence and wealth are like underwear: if you have it, don't flaunt it. If you do, shame shame.

6. I am proudly independent. I only do things when I want to. I don't ask permission for my pleasures. I moved out the day I graduated and have vowed to myself to never move back in. Probably why my life revolves around work. And probably why I'm still single.

7. I knew I was independent as early as I can remember. When I was a kid, all my Barbie's had their own condo, car and they travelled the world. Ken, unfortunately was always a boyfriend and never a husband.

8. At work, I'm the only girl in a team of 10. Although I'm fiercely independent, secretly I like the fact I don't have to lift a finger when it comes to chores. Aside from being the only girl, I'm also the youngest.

9. I'm not exactly superstitious. But every New Year's Eve, you'll see me jumping up and down. I don't actually believe I will grow taller, but you never know. Who knows? I believe that anything's possible so maybe a few more years of jumping on New Year's Eve, my 5'5 frame will be 5'7. Hah!

10. I love to sleep. My bed is my zen, sleeping is my zen. Which is why a lot of effort is put into getting the right kind of sheets and making sure I have enough pillows and a comfy blanket. My bed is the only witness to my life. Goodness, if my bed could talk...hahaha!

So after a shouting match with the arrogant bi, I'm now trying to keep a low profile. I didn't really mean to get into a fight with him but as usual, the urge to defend (aka butt in!) won. I couldn't really just sit there and allow him to insult my friend right? Right!

I really hate it when people throw the phrase "you're being defensive"! I mean, really! Can't you come up with anything better to say? I guess their offense is their defense, or their defense is there offense. Hmm, whatever! The point is, I really feel bad for this dude. Being a certified true aquarian, I can say that I'm pretty good at empathizing. But still, it amazes me how most people have such low level of awareness. When you're an arrogant bastard, I'm sure there must be some indication pointing to the fact that you are an arrogant bastard. You can't just go through life acting like one and never realizing that the people surrounding you hates your guts!

"sometimes I just feel so lost..."

A Year Older, A day Wiser...

Yesterday I turned a year older..doesn't really feel different. Once in awhile I catch myself looking in the mirror checking for some wrinkles but other than that I still feel like I'm 25. And I say 25 because I know how foolish I was when I was 21. Today, I know I'm much wiser than I was yesterday although I know that there's so much more for me to learn and experience. Wisdom doesn't necessarily come with age you know...but I guess for now, I'll put my worries behind me and just enjoy my life.

Happy birthday to me.

Moron!

I did something horrendously stupid last night. I sent a text message while I was half a sleep and sent it to the wrong person. I swear I'm not one of those people, I don't recall ever having to say sorry wrong send! But last night was the worst first time ever! You see there's this two guys, let's call them A and B. I work with A, although I used to work for him now we're not so far apart in the organizations food chain. So he sent B to work with my team, whom I highly suspect is gay. It wouldn't have mattered but B is your typical know-it-all, obnoxious kiss-ass. I knew that B was sent to spy on us and to report anything A can use against us. The thing is, A and I are what you call frenemies. We're nice to each other because we both have our use but I never forget that he's a lying conniving son of a bitch. It's just how it is.

So anyway, he told me that B is bisexual and he's very adamant that B is not gay. Like there's a big difference right? Even if there was, I swear B is gay and not bi. So B actually works with this girl who works for me and last night she asked me about him. But she texted around 10 pm which makes it midnight here. So I woke up because of her txt. I decided to reply, but being in PNG I have to use my local phone to reply which is why i couldn't just press reply. The really really stupid thing that I did was I sent the message to A! Thank God I don't have the number of B!! But yeah, I texted A what was supposed to be a text for that girl. And I said, "B is bisexual daw. Pwede kay dodong pwede kay inday! haha" YES that's what I said!! Well, we secretly call B duday over here so I had to explain to this girl why we called him duday.

So there, needless to say that woke me up. Me and my big mouth! I'm not sure what I'm going to say to A when I see him later today. Now I know how people feel when they say they wished the ground would open up and just disappear!

Genius!

This is just absolutely hilarious! What can I say? Sex sells!

An Epiphany in the Shower

I was taking a shower when it dawned on me...I realized what I'm going to do next. As I've been contemplating what to do with my life, not knowing what to do next bothered me more than usual. Maybe because my birthday is just a couple of weeks away and I'm starting to feel the pressure of age being female and all. I'm just not sure what to aim for at this stage in my life. All my friends seem to aim to look for a man in their life. Some have succeeded and some have just turned desperate. I've also thought of buying my own place although I've never seriously considered it since I usually shy away from commitments. Yes even buying property takes commitment. I just never felt the need. But as I said, I was taking a shower when I realized that I should do it. I've never really had a home, neither has my mom and her mom. And having a home would not only make my mother and grandmother proud but I would also be fulfilling something that they never had. So there, I'm going to build a house.

Thank God for showers.

Events

I'm now back in weird country of Papua New Guinea. With more responsibilities, more problems and with more stresses albeit with more pay, I can't exactly say that I've got a happy state of mind. In just a few days, I need to make a presentation to the whole team and maybe a few government officials about the details of my job. Although I'm not the only one with this daunting task, I feel that I'm going to have to stand there and prove to my boss that I deserved that raise.

Having been here for almost two years now, I can finally say that I'm starting to feel more comfortable with my environment. I can't say that I've fully adjusted, and I don't think I'll ever adjust. Still, it's a good job with great pay and I like some of the people I work with. Keyword: some. But you wanna know a secret? Even with the great benefits and all the travel oppurtunities, I still have moments where I ask myself is this it? is it enough? and what next? I guess figuring out what you really want out of life is never easy.

*I'm going back to Tahiti*

I'm flying back to Manila in a couple of days, and let me tell you, despite the high of all the wonderful last minute shopping, I'm excited to get back to Manila. I was there for less than two days after being away for 3 months so I'm excited to visit my usual hang-outs and some of my close friends. Granted I only have 5 days and lots of work to finish before I head back to the "beautiful country" of Papua New Guinea, still, I can't wait to go to ATC and Greenbelt 3 again. A visit to the spa would be great too. Hah! Either way, I'm just glad that I'm over all the problems although I had a good time here in LA and maybe someday I'll get to visit again.

By the way, "I'm going back to tahiti" is this stupid song that I can't get out of my head!

Moments

Sometimes I get tired of being the grown-up, of doing the right thing. Sometimes I get tired of taking care of other people wondering when will someone take care of me for a change. Sometimes I get tired of understanding wondering when is it my turn to be understood. And yet, during those moments, I feel ashamed of feeling that way. I don't want to be selfish but still, I get tired and wonder when it will all end.

"Somebody tell me why I'm on my own, if there's a soulmate for everyone..."

The American Dream

A few days ago, I purchased a local sim card for my phone. Turned out that the guy selling phone accessories was Filipino as well. We talked for a bit while he was trying to sell me on the advantages of getting the stupid sim card from him. I told him I was just visiting then he asked me why not just stay. Here in America. As in TNT and hide from Immigration and hope for the best.

It took me two seconds to think about it and yet it was like so much went through my mind. The first thing I thought was "why should I?". Not that I'm a snob or anything but I never really got that urge to escape to America. I mean, I have a good job, I'm independent and well, I just don't want too. But while people around me thought that going to the states was the answer to their problems, and I admit that for awhile I thought that too. I don't think I ever believed it but I remember thinking it but I never acted on it no matter how many chances I had.

The thing is, I'm at a point in my life where I'm trying to figure out where I want to settle down. I work in Papua New Guinea, I go home to the Philippines every 8 weeks and I'm now in LA. I just feel that something's gotta give. I can't go on like this right? I gotta put down some roots right? Otherwise, I just may end up alone and not have a place to call home. I guess that's what this really is about, home. I'm trying to figure out where I should spend the prime of my life. I'm thinking that I should pick a country and just pop up. What do you think? I'm thinking France...or maybe New Zealand? or Perth! I don't know..I have to give it some serious thought. The Japanese girl that I currently share an apartment with just popped up here in LA. Of course she speaks english but the point is, if she can do it surely so can I right? Right. Now if only I know what I want.

Gawd, She's Hot!

Santa Monica

Someday I'm going to buy myself a house by the beach. I'm also going to have a yellow labrador and I'm going to call him George. So there.

Want Some Cheese?

I just noticed that I seem to whine a lot in my blog. Don't worry I'm not really like that in person. Really. I hate whiny people. But when it gets tough you gotta have a way to vent right? So a whining blog it is. Hah!

Anyway, I'm still freezing. I'm still procrastinating and not doing any work. And I'm hating on whiny people right now. I mean, so you didn't get things your way! Boo-the fuck-hoo! Get over it! That's life man! Sometimes it's just the way it is.

Wait a minute. I'm talking about someone else, not me. Although I'm one to talk! Sheesh! Talk about the pot and the kettle.

Whatever. Just stop whining and get out of my face!

The City of Angels

Spending the holidays in Los Angeles turned out to be alright for me. I came here expecting the worse with my mom being sick and not having any other relatives in this part of the United States, I thought it would be extremely stressful for me. But thankfully, my mother's recovering and I'm getting some time off walking the streets of downtown Los Angeles. (not to mention all the shopping! shhh!)

The only drawback really is the weather. It's 5 C out there and as much as I like the cold, I have a feeling I'm getting too old for it. I'm just sooo dry! And I've never really been that type of girl that slops on all kinds of greasy lotions. Albeit I think it's safe to say that I AM that type of girl that likes buying all those things especially with Victoria's Secret and Bath & Body Works just around the corner! (Gawd just thinking about it gets me all giddy!) But so anyway, yeah, I'm dry. My skin is just so flaky and dry, not that it's something I should be proud of but I have no idea how people function in the cold. Some days I really just want to hide under the comforter and stay in bed all day. But then, where's the adventure in that?! So, despite the cold and dryness, I always try to find the courage to go out in the cold and explore. So far, I can say that I'm liking LA. People are really friendly over here. And with the help of the internet, getting around is pretty easy. I've almost gotten used to waking up to someone honking their horn to the tune of "La Cucaracha" and being called purr-ty once in a while. Also, sharing an apartment with 2 Japanese yuppies is pretty cool given the fact that I just lo-ove Japanese food. Not that there's a connection really, but if I love the food then the people should be just as nice. :-)