Waste of Space

I hate to say it, but some people are born to be assholes. Or maybe their mothers turned them into one. I don't know. The point is some people can be such a disappointment? I mean if you can't be a decent person then the least you can do is stay away from decent people.

There's this guy I know, he walks around thinking that he's all that. He likes to knock people down first and then show them that he, and he alone hold the tools to pick them up - and then they're eternally grateful. It's a strange way to make himself important. To me, it's just hypocrisy.

Anyhow, I'm not really a person that likes to bow down and give you what you want. Which is probably why I'm like a target to people like him. It's pretty difficult to deal with a bitch like me especially when you're an asshole. Thank god I can be such a bitch!

Discovery Channel: I Love This!

PC vs. MAC

"Where are you headed? To something or someone good or are you just spending your life wading through one day to the next?"

Coincidence

Is there such a thing as pure coincidence?

I've wondered all my life about what has happened to him? To the man I called 'dad'..Most of the time I've resigned myself to the fact that I will never find out. But a part of me, just a small part, is still hoping that maybe one day I will get the answers I am looking for.

It's weird. I feel that I need to know, the need to find him. It's probably because there's no closure. Funny coz at times whenI try to analyze myself (which I admit is quite often) I know that all my issues is somehow connected to him. The feelings of inadequacy, distrust, suspicion, abandonment and all the toppings that go with it can be directly connected to my relationship (or lack thereof) with him.

The only good thing about this whole thing is I get to push things out of my mind. It's not that hard to pretend. Pretend that everything's ok? Fine. I can pretend when I really have to. Except for moments like these. For some weird twist of fate, it turns out that (get this!) the boyfriend of the half-sister of my half-brother has the same name as him. I can even see some similarities ( or it's probably my over-active imagination). Are they related? I don't know. And I don't think I'll ever have the courage to find out. Still...the wheels of my mind are turning, again. And, as I said, it could simply be a coincidence and it probably is. It's just that a small part of me is hoping that it's not a coincidence. Maybe..just maybe, if it's not then I can finally have the closure that's been long overdue.